Enterprise Coffee Decisioner

This is a submission for the DEV April Fools Challenge What I Built I built Enterprise Coffee Decisioner™, an intentionally useless April Fools web app that decides whether you should drink coffee using corporate nonsense and teapot drama. Neon “enterprise” UI with fake KPI dashboard (Synergy Index, Caffeine Half-Life, Jitter Probability, Board Alignment). 17-point strategic intake form with absurd entries (Lunar Influence, Manager Proximity, Last Git Commit). “⬡ FINALIZE DECISION ⬡” includes re